To tell or not to tell

Each one of us has gone through different phases in life. Since childhood to adulthood we go through different situations and experiences in life. We face all types of experiences, good, bad, ugly, bitter, embarrassing and so on. Some of us like to share are experiences while other do not. At times the incidents are such that we never feel like sharing with anybody and there is nothing wrong in it.

When couples come into a relationship it is not that they are beginning their life since that particular day or with that particular relationship. Most of the couples have a past before coming into a relationship. A past is something departed and should be forgotten. But mostly people do not forget their past and carry it along with them into a new relationship. Many of the couples are under a trauma of whether to tell about it to their mate or not. As said earlier a past is something bygone and should be forgotten so why talk about it? Forgetting the past and not discussing about it to your partner does not mean to be secretive and cheat your partner. It is better to forget and not to tell about it to your mate as it avoids from creating unnecessary misunderstandings. If you are confident that your mate will understand and will not be affected with it then go ahead and put in the picture in front of your spouse. But if you doubt it is best to forget it and never talk about it especially if it is unnecessary. Think about how much you go through till your twenties. In the teens individuals are ignorant and innocent; as such they make a lot of mistakes. You as a teenager must have gone through experiences that must have been bitter and unexplainable. But as you grow you learn a lot from those incidents yet you cannot forget them. Now if you think that you could share your episode without creating problems between you and your partner then you should never hesitate and certainly share to lessen the burden.

Telling your mate about your past could create insecurity, distrust and doubt in your partner’s mind. Therefore it would be better not to tell about your past and disregard it all together. Your steady relationship could become shaky needlessly. Think about it and then go ahead. Usually people get different thoughts in mind regarding the experience you had and could consider it as your fault rather than someone else. And this would create problems between the two of you. This is the case especially when you are not able to express your experience in the correct form. There could be misinterpretations and you would be put on the wrong. So if you feel that your experience is extraneous and will put you on the wrong you should keep quite and try to not to recall it. Try to erase that chapter completely from your life and begin a fresh and happy life with your partner. This would be better for you, your partner and the relationship as the whole.

Tags: relationship, childhood, adulthood